Joke of the Day

A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard. Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing,
stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.
The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration, as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping
her cell phone and makeup.

As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to
exit her car with her hands up.

He took her to the police station where she was searched, fingerprinted, photographed, and placed in a holding cell. After a couple of hours, a policeman
approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.

He said, ”I’m very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front
of you and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the ‘What Would Jesus Do’ bumper sticker, the ‘Choose Life’ license plate ho lder, the ‘Follow Me
to Sunday-School’ bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk,

so naturally…I assumed you had stolen the car.”

 

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Time for a new trend

I have decided, for some fun, humor, and to ease my boredom, that each week in my own little corner of the bloggosphere I will pick a theme, and each day of that week I will provide songs either in MP3, or wav format, song lyrics, poems, videos, websites, book reviews and essays on that particular theme. Our first theme will be Old Houses. So, watch this space for what I’ll blog about houses next week.!

A NOTE, AND A FINAL WARNING

Hi y’all:

Here’s what’s up. Think of my blog as my safe place… My haven… My home. When I put my blog in my signature, or when I give the link to someone to read, that is like inviting them to my home — my haven and safe place.

Unfortunately, as with life off the net, sometimes, people show up at your home that are not wanted. And as with life off the net, sometimes, a simple “go away!” doesn’t do the trick.

Think of this as a NO TRESPASS warning.

A spammer has visited my blog in recent days. A spammer with whom I have done battle over the past few months. This spammer runs a site for patients and caregivers, and also tries to solicit patients to participate in her “surveys” and “patient experience” questionaires, which are really a front for her marketing agency.

Now, while I have nothing against her website for patients and caregivers, I do take offense to her spamming groups to which I belong to get people to join her in her quest. She has already been banned from c-t-d, and will likely be banned from others, if I have anything to say about it.

So, here is my final warning to her.

BELINDA SHALE, OWNER OF ICARECAFE, DO NOT SPAM MY BLOG AGAIN!!! DO NOT LEAVE ME COMMENTS, DO NOT PING ME OR LEAVE TRACKBACKS. I AM NOT VISITING YOUR SITE, I HAVE NOT VISITED YOUR SITE, AND I WILL NOT VISIT YOUR SITE. YOU *ARE NOT* WELCOME HERE. AS OF RIGHT NOW, YOU STILL HAVE PERMISSION TO READ MY BLOG, BUT ONE MORE COMMENT, ONE MORE SPAM, ONE MORE PINGBACK OR TRACKBACK AND NOT ONLY WILL I BLOCK YOU FROM READING MY BLOG, BUT I WILL ALSO NOTIFY YOUR INTERNET SERVICE PROVIDER.

LEST YOU FORGET, DEAR SPAMMER, I AM A NATIONAL PARK RANGER. THAT MEANS I AM A FEDERAL LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICER. YOU HARASS ME, AND YOU WILL GET NAILED. THERE’S A FEDERAL LAW REGARDING ANNOYING/HARASSING PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET, AND I’VE GOT FRIENDS WHO WORK IN THE FBI COMPUTER CRIMES DEVISION.

STAY AWAY FROM ME!!! OR FACE THE CONSEQUENCES!

To anyone who patronizes this woman’s sites, I’m sorry if I offended you. It’s not her sites so much as the lying, bait-and-switch and spam she engages in to get people to join her…

I can provide proof upon request.

She has been forewarned.

So… Who am I, exactly?

So… Just who is Dodge, anyway?

Yes, you read that right. My name is Dodge. No, it’s not a nickname. That is the name I was born with. Now, in deference to my greatness, please make no references to Dodge trucks, Dodge Kansas or “Getting the hell out of Dodge”.

I am a Law Enforcement ranger in America’s National Parks. When I’m not doing that, I am a firefighter with an emphasis on wildland, forest and brush fires. I am also a paramedic, and work on an ambulance and on a helicopter as a flight medic.

Two years ago, almost three now, I was burned badly during a wildland fire gone wrong. I won’t go into what happened that day, it’s just too painful, but I will say that I was burned with 4th and 5th degree burns, (yes, there are such things), over about 85% of my body. At first, my doctors said my burns were 3rd degree. They then revised that to 4th and 5th degree because my organs and bones were burned. Can anyone say crispy?

I have to have a sense of humor about all this, because if I didn’t, I’d be suicidal… So, I do. That’s that.

I am in my early 30’s, in a long-term relationship, (yeah, I’m gay, so what’s it to ya?), and likely to stay that way for quite a while. I am sensitive, compassionate, in tune with nature, serious yet possessing an often dark sense of humor that people either really love or really hate. I believe in kindness, compassion and treating others the same way you would like to be treated. I believe in dignity in medical care and in people living to their fullest, no matter what disabilities or diseases they have, because everybody’s got one. I believe in guns, because guns don’t kill people, people kill people. I believe in the death penalty, in tougher sentences for criminals, and in mental health testing for our police and corrections officers.

I am a gun owner, a vehicle owner, a dog owner, a horse owner and a boat owner. I am an avid player of video games, especially anything where I can drive fast or shoot bad guys.

I am involved in Search and Rescue with my German Shepherd, Ricco.

Because of my burns and autoimmune diseases doctors believe I acquired in the fire, I am in severe chronic pain, for which I take opioids. You’ll notice I talk about them a lot. They keep me functional, and sane, which is a good thing.

I am Dodge… Uncompromising, aggressive at my work, kind to those I meet, willing to help when I can and hurt when I must, serious about what interests me and about having fun, glad and lucky to be alive, and truly, truly blessed to serve in law enforcement and E.M.S!

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